One of the biggest setbacks that hinder us from moving forward is forgiveness, you know, when you marinate in hate, anguish and pain and more or less play the blame game. “That person wronged me because they did this, that person wronged me because they did that”. We spend so much time looking at other people’s faults and what they have done to us that makes us react the way that we do rather than take accountability for our own actions, for our flaws and faults and our shortcomings. It’s so much easier to look at other people’s faults and talk badly about them rather than looking at ourselves. It’s just so much easier to state what other people should be working on in their lives and in correcting their ways rather than taking the time to focus on our lives and correct our ways. It truly reminds me of the biblical verse where it states in Matthew 7:3 “Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?”.
What are we truly accomplishing by focusing on someone else’s flaws or faults? Does it benefit us any in helping us develop our character or self worth? I think not. If anything, devaluing another person, judging them, focusing on their flaws and then talking about them only brews judgment, hatred and dishonor in our hearts. It does nothing for our spiritual growth or the betterment of our persona. It’s more important to “clean our own home”, to focus on the things that make us the person God has called us to be. It’s time to free ourselves from the bondage that we cast upon each other with our inferior and superior judgments and focus on what we can do to make ourselves better individuals.
Forgiveness is such a powerful tool that we must exercise and apply to our lives rather than letting anger and hatred brew in our hearts. I have my personal take on forgiveness. More than often we hold anger, resentment and hang-ups over others while that other person doesn’t even have a clue. Often times we have a warped perception of what that person did that caused us to react the way we did when in fact we should just be focusing on if we reacted or are reacting in a Godlike manner. Rather than wait for the other person to forgive you or for you to hear an apology because that person did not act in the way you would have expected it is important to take a look in the mirror and ask ourselves if we are being proactive rather than reactive with our perceptions, beliefs and judgments.
Talking badly about an individual, gossiping putting another person down, all of that does nothing positive for the soul. None of it is beneficial for the human existence. In no way does it move us forward rather it keeps us prisoners in a toxic reality and environment which we ourselves construct.
Rather than focus on the flaws of another let us take the time to focus on one flaw of ourselves that we can improve on and take the steps to setting ourselves free from the bondage that comes from judgment, vengeance and hate.